Wednesday, 18 April 2012

Does James Cameron hate the movie going public?

James Cameron has made some of the highest grossing films of all time; that's not open to debate a quick look at Wikipedia's highest-grossing films list proves this. I'm sure you're all Internet savvy enough to find this out yourself but to save you the hassle the screen shot below confirms this.

But perhaps all this proves is that the majority of the movie going public are idiots and James Cameron has gotten rich off the back of that. Avatar is a very very bland film with the most unoriginal plot imaginable, Dances with Smurfs or Fern Gulley 2: this time it personal pretty much sum it up. Titanic also has such a bland and unoriginal plot you could sleep through the film wake up with 5 minutes to go and you'd know what's gone on. Does this make him evil? Possibly not, unless you subscribe to the ideal that money is the root of all evil. So what does make him evil?

3D Bloody 3D

Not content releasing a rubbish film with Avatar he insisted on pushing his new 3D stereoscopic camera like it was the coming of a new dawn. Better than sliced bread? Better Jesus? Not really, not even better than 2D, but we've had to put up with a slew of 3D films including some truly horrendous 3D retrofits. I'm talking to you Clash of the Titans, with your ridiculous floating Liam Neeson head. That's how crazy he's made the world even the shittest films are chasing the 3D dollar. 

Forcing us to wear dark glasses over our normal glasses whilst in a darkened room reducing the vibrancy of the picture just so we can see the odd thing come out of the screen at us...... really that's all the benefit we get, floating stuff and things waved in our face. Not only that we're make to pay extra for the bloody glasses that reduce our enjoyment of the film. We should be getting a bloody discount not paying for the privilege.

King of the World!?!

Not happy with inflicting 3D on us he also gave us the worst Oscar acceptance speech EVER. "I'm King of the World," is that not the most arrogant big headed thing you've ever heard? I'm king of the world, really? Whats he think he's done bloody cured cancer, saved some orphans, no?.............. Just directed a film that some teenage girls saw 20 times and then some octogenarians at the academy thought was better than LA Confidential. That makes you king of the world? Maybe the king of the world title people are just phoning it in these days we'll be giving it to the tramp who plays the accordion at the end of my street, or a monkey playing the drums next.
Future King of the World?
Titanic again?

Why is Titanic in cinemas again? I can't for the live of me figure it out, if you have any idea please put it in the comments at the bottom I'd love to know. Maybe Mr Cameron has a payment due on that sub he's use to explore the Mariana Trench? Perhaps he's gonna explore the moon or the sun next? Announce himself king of the moon?

Encouraging the Proliferation of Shit Films

Finally the most recent heinous act? What else could he have done, drowning rabbits, stealing sweets from children, is he the cause of global warming? No worse than all that he's encouraging Arnie to make another terminator film, read the full story here. Why would another terminator film be a good idea? Ignoring the fact that 3 and 4 were god awful films with pretty much no redeeming features, particularly number 4 with the charisma vacuum that is Sam Worthington in the lead, and a plot filled with so many holes you could put James Cameron's sub through it.

Above all this another terminator film with Arnie makes no sense, he's 64 years old, why would Skynet make an unstoppable killing machine that ages? I'd love to see the Skynet Dragons Den episode where someone tried to get funding for that idea. "Well I've got an idea it's an unstoppable killing machine that can travel back in time only problem is he ages" robot Theo would be out before he could come up with some unfunny remark. The Skynet folks seem to have put a lot of effort into the T-800 you'd think they'd iron out the kinks first. He's unstoppable until his hip goes and then he'll be unstoppable again once he's had his hip replacement but he's on a waiting list. What could James Cameron possible gain from this? Clearly he just hates everyone in the world....... that includes you.

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